top of page
Search
  • Writer's pictureJared Yellin

You Can Hate Your Greatest Mentors While Still Learning From Them

“When you realize that even your mentors take poops, you begin to learn from them, and because of them, in a way that was not possible prior.” - JY

“I can’t believe he said that.”

“You have to be kidding me. Why would he do that?”

“What a complete and utter scumbag.”

“Ugh, I don’t like this person.”


I will never forget when one of the top personal development gurus filled out a contact us form on the website for a marketing agency that I owned in 2014.


I thought it was fake at first, but the inquiry seemed eerily on point. Usually, leads were pursued by my sales team, but I felt obligated to give this one a call.


Ring ring ring….


“Hello, this is Bob (I am protecting this person's identity in the article)...”


“Is this really Bob Smith?”


“Yes, who is this?”


HOLY MOLY - Bob was a mentor from afar in my world. I read all of his books and completed all of his courses - I can’t believe he inquired about marketing support!


The conversation continued for about an hour, and then we agreed to meet in Texas for an event where Bob was speaking to determine whether it made sense to work together on a project.


As I flew into Texas, I thought to myself - I freakin made it!


The thought that Bob would reach out to ME for my services was a big deal, and it was going to put me on the map in a way that would leapfrog me years into the future with regard to growth and scale.


After a full day of meetings, it was clear that Bob was right for me, and I was right for Bob, so we inked a deal, and it was time to get to work.


But Bob was a D-Bag!

As we began building the strategy to launch a new online course, I got to see the REAL BOB.


He was rude…

He was condescending…

He was a liar…

He was a cheat…

He was absolutely the complete opposite of who I wanted to become as a person…


I was flabbergasted by how much I did not like Bob, and I found myself reciting the same sentence over and over in my head…


“I am going to show you by NOT learning from you.”


And the more I held firm on this statement, the more I realized that Bob would not be impacted by this decision, but I most certainly would be…


Before I knew what was going on in Bob’s kitchen - I loved the food, I loved the ambiance, I loved the experience, but once I got behind the doors and really dug into who Bob is as a human - I was repulsed.


And then it hit me…

You don't need to like the people you learn from.


People are WAYYYY too romantic about their mentors, teachers, preachers, etc.


If you don't agree with just ONE of their values, you disregard all the others that will help you grow.


If you don't agree with just ONE video they produce, you intentionally prevent yourself from learning anything else.


If you don't agree with their POLITICAL stance, you ignore all of the lessons they can bestow upon you.


Here's what I know to be true for me…


Once I dropped my ego to Bob, I began to learn at an accelerated rate.


Bob is a human…


NOT my type of human BUT his ideas, philosophies, and perspectives are thought-provoking and have served me MORE than what I learned about him hurt me…


I decided to isolate the Bob that I was exposed to behind the scenes with the Bob who had DRAMATICALLY impacted my life with his work.


Because remember…


You don't need to like the people you learn from.


As a result, I have learned WAYYYYYYYYYYYYYY more (like 100X more) from the people I don't like versus those I do...


Some of these lessons have been - what NOT to do...

Some of these lessons have been - exactly what I NEEDED at the moment...

Some of these lessons have been - extremely challenging to embrace...


Try this on for size...


REMOVE the human - their face, skin color, political belief, gender, previous success or failure, religion, etc…


Does the lesson they share - whether intentional or not - SERVE YOU…?


If yes, learn from it.

If not, learn because of it.


Everything in life is a WIN or a LESSON, and EVERYONE in life has the ability to contribute to one or both.


STOP worrying about LIKING who you learn from and just begin to learn...


Live with Intention,



Comments


bottom of page